Everybody Loves a Clown

I'm going to go out on a limb and suggest that this isn't good news. That's right: a mysterious clown is silently terrorizing the residents of Northhampton, UK. It's not the usual murdery kind of terrorizing -- at least, as far as we know. The clown just...stands on street corners, silently staring down passersby, but NOT terrorizing anyone with a knife. Methinks he (it?) doth protest too much. According to the Independent, “A number of sightings of people dressed as clowns have also been reported across Northampton in recent weeks."

The clown has appeared in several locations in the Abington and Kingsley areas of the town. On each sighting, he or she has worn the same white face makeup, red wig, all-in-one suit and oversized bowtie.... [T]he clown knocked on someone's door and offered to paint their window sills despite having no painting equipment.... He doesn't juggle. He doesn't twist balloons into animal shapes. He just stares.

The current speculation is, of course, that the whole thing is a publicity stunt, even considering the apparently numerous mystery clowns roaming the town. But then again, maybe it’s the mysterious cabal of children-kidnapping clowns who menaced the United States in 1981? Or perhaps they represent the mystery religion underlying the juggalo movement, which has turned its baleful eye on England.

You decide.